You know, parenting when our kids are young is in many ways much easier. Sure, you're tired all the time, and it requires a certain level of mental, physical and emotional energy at all times, but as a parent you also know all that is going on. Your kids talk to you then, about everything. I remember my kids would tell me about getting in trouble in class. I used to laugh, thinking it's funny that they don't know NOT to tell me. But I loved that, because we could talk through their decision making process, and we could problem solve situations together.
Somewhere in middle school, though, there is a disconnect that happens. Not completely. They still talk, but it's more at their own pace, and the information trickles in a little more slowly. They process things more on their own, and handle things more on their own, too.
So I guess as parents we are gradually weened from that control, and the relationship turns more into one of a guider or counselor as they start making more and more of their own decisions. But for us, every now and then, through parents of our kids' friends, we hear of some of the decisions they have made, and I have to say I'm pleased. They not only make good decisions when placed in tough situations, but they are making them decisively. No question about it, and the stand is made. When my friends tell me what they hear about my kids, I just have to thank God for those moments we had before. Those tough times with friends or sticky situations that they had when they were young were important life lessons about dealing with people and making stands.
I think it's important for kids to know it's OK to talk to us about their mistakes, and it's OK for them to make them. My kiddos are not perfect. They are learning like the rest of us. But they are also making some good decisions, and I'm so happy to see it.
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