Saturday, February 10, 2007

In the throws of parenting

I don't know if I should call it parenting, supervising, chauffering, coaching, teaching.....I've been just about everything this week. Em is pretty self sufficient these days and just checks in occasionally. Timothy is in soccer and track, and is working hard to bring up his gpa with a teacher who is bound and determined that EVERY paper EVERY child hands in is PERFECT. UGH. I can say he's risen to the occasion, though. Christopher is the thespian he's always wanted to be, having presented us with his acting debut as Red Chief in the play "Ransom of Red Chief." Practices were every night this week, and I learned I can make long pants look like knickers in a jiffy. Last but not least was Nathaniel's birthday which we celebrated as a family on Monday, and with his class on Friday. After getting in bed after midnight last night, I ended up crashing this afternoon, and I think I'm almost caught up. Vitamins B and C are a high priority at this point.

On the serious side of things, we've had to deal with Christopher enduring the needless and unwarranted hostilities from a new student in class. Christopher is a tenderhearted person who cares about others and their feelings. I told him that it's a mistake for this boy to see his kindness as a weakness though, and it is important for him to set clear boundaries with him. It has made sense to him, and I think it's a life lesson the he has had to learn early. Unfortunately.

T and I know all too well what it is like to be unjustly accused, for someone to constantly present us in a negative light, and constantly speak to us from that standpoint. We've had to take our own advice, and are able to pass on things we have learned. Going through difficult situations or relationships is worth it, especially if we can take what we have learned and help someone else. We've learned it doesn't matter if the other person or people don't recognize what they have done. That is not within our control. All we can do is try to influence or enlightened the offenders. If they choose to deny, there's not much we can do. It is important, though, to withdraw from the relationship, to prevent toxic buildup, and to keep the offenders from becoming REPEAT offenders. They can't change what they don't acknowledge.

It's hard seeing our children go through situations like this. It's also difficult not to put our own emotions from our own experiences on our kids. It's important to stay objective, listen, and respond appropriately. We want our kids to be open with us, don't we? And teachable. Teachable is good.

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